Christmas Pestimist Club
Dec. 24th, 2004 12:07 pmIt's a little known but sad fact that the following year the weather was fine and Rudolph returned to being a second-class citizen. Even Santa wouldn't let him play reindeer games. On Christmas day Rudolph wasn't seen anywhere. The next day he was found, dead, by the side of the road with the word "FREAK" written on his belly in his own blood. When the elf police went through the town to question suspects they discovered that Blitzen had skipped town. The case remains open as police have no interest in stirring up trouble with no useful results; sort of like how everyone knows the voting was rigged in Ohio, but Bush is still going to be inaugurated in a few weeks. The press doesn't have the balls to bring it up since they fear being put on Santa's "naughty" list, which might result in their next merger being nixed by the SEC, FCC, or who knows, maybe even the FDA.